Becca,

Oh. My. Goodness. Every single fiber of my being right now wishes with all my might that I was there to see the senior citizen throwdown event slash riot. I just know that one day in the distant future when you and I are living together in a senior community like that we will be that passionate about things like Halloween. In fact, we will probably be the ones starting the altercations. I think I spelled that wrong. I really can't tell anymore. Anyway, I think that would be a WONDERFUL idea for a TV show. Legit. If stuff like what you described happens every now and then, it would be a hit. After all, look at how many people like Betty White?

1) Our casino is NOT a riverboat. I think I would've known that by now if it was. Plus, I get nauseous swinging on a swingset, let along on a boat so that would not be a good time for me OR you. But if it is a riverboat by some odd chance, you'd better believe I'm gonna be saying "I'm on a boat!" the WHOLE WEEKEND!

2) Danny=lame

3) I LOVE BRUNO MARS! And that makes me love him even more if he's a christian. Every time I hear that a popular artist is Christian, it makes me want to go buy their CD in the store because I want to support them. Maybe I'll go buy his CD. Did you also know he was born in Honolulu Hawaii? HE IS THE COOLEST GUY EVER! I bet he plays trumpet too. That would make him the coolest. His voice reminds me a lot of Michael Jackson. It makes me happy that his song is always like number one or two on the charts. Enough about him.

4) I'm going to invite giraffes to my wedding. But they better not eat any of my crackers!

5) I ate a bunch of candy last night and today. A BUNCH! Okay, so a bunch for you is probably not the same definition as my bunch, but I ate at least 7 small candy bars last night and 3 today.

6) Selena is hit or miss with me. I like SOME of her songs, but i don't like more. I'm always gonna like Demi over Selena. I think Demi has a better, stronger voice and her music is more my style. If we cannot resolve this conflict I'm afraid our friendship will have to end.

7) Mama G and I are going to Easton tomorrow to go to the new H&M store. I'M SO EXCITED. I've never been to an H&M store but I've heard they're fantastic! Hopefully I don't go broke. Good thing I just got paid today.

8) If I would've dressed up for halloween this year, I would've dressed up as a ninja turtle.

9) MY LADY GAGA CD IS FINALLY IN AT THE LIBRARY! I've been waiting about 6 months for it to come it and NOW IT"S HERE! That means I can FINALLY rock out to Poker Face in my car.

10) I just realized I've been using A LOT of caps this post.

11) I just realized this post is very long. We're getting back into old habits. Oh dear....

12) I am concerned about these children who's faces you are painting. OOOOO I HAVE AN IDEA! Paint one kids face to look like mine! That way you can see me and won't miss me.

13) I'm glad you found a friend. I will begin praying for this Megan girl as she will need my prayers...

14) HERE WE GO AAAAGGGGGGAAAAAAIIIIIIINNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Rachel-Demi-Is-Better-Fuhrman

Rachel,

I have more exciting newwwwwwwwwws!!!!

1) I think our casino is a riverboat.

2) I gave Danny the opportunity to be my best friend for the day. He failed.

3) Bruno Mars is a Christian!!!!! Well, I believe! Ye just showed me the lyrics of a song written by a pastor who came and spoke at her church last week. He's a rapper, and he wrote this song, and it features Bruno Mars!! Straight up biblical. Look at the lyrics:

Now Hollywood wants to make you think they know what love is

But I'm a tell you what true love is

Love is not what you see in the movies

It's not the ecstasy, it's not what you see in that scene

You know what I mean?

I'm telling you right now, true love is sacrifice

Love is selfless not selfish.

Love is God and God is love

Love is when you lay down your life for another

Whether for your brother, your mother, your father or your sister

It's even laying down your life for your enemies

That's unthinkable, but think about that

Love is true.

Think.

I'll put You in front of me

So everybody can see

My love, this is my love

I know that I'll be alright

As long as You are my guide

My love, this is my love

Love is patient, love is kind

It does not envy, it does not boast

It is not proud.

Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking

It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs

You see love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth

It always protects, always trusts always hopes, it always perseveres

Love never fails. Love is everlasting.

It's eternal, it goes on and on, it goes beyond time

Love is the only thing that will last when you die

But ask the question, why?

Do you have love?

Chorus

There is no greater love than this: he who lays down his life for his friend

Now are you willing to lay down your life for your friend?

You're probably willing to lay down your life for your friend, for your mother, your father, or your best friends

But are you willing to lay down your life for even those who hate you?

I'm going to tell you who did that

The definition of love is Jesus Christ. He is love.

The nails in His hands, the thorns in His brow

Hanging on a cross for your sin and my sins

That is love. He died for you and me while we still hated Him.

That is love.

God is true love, and if you don't know this love

Now is the time to know. Perfect love.

RIGHT?!?!?!?!

4) Sorry about the narcoleptic dog. I watched it again and it made me sad. I want to take care of poor little Skeeter. I decided that at my wedding, dogs will be invited as well.

5) Skeeter makes me think of Doug. I want to watch Doug. Maybe I'll google it later. I should've bought those Doug VHS tapes when I saw them all those years ago at Family Video.... I shall always regret that day.

6) I'm eating a cheese tart thing. It's like a mini cheesecake with fruit inside. Solid goodness.

7) I have Selena Gomez in my head. I like it. Selena trumps Demi any day.

8) I am going to paint children's faces today for three hours. I look forward to it. Two words: artistic license.

9) Listen to this coinkidink. My roommate from Project, Megan? She's from North Carolina. Her best friend from home just moved to Indy for grad school at Butler. She messaged me the other day about meeting up... she said that she lives on the edge of Carmel, she goes to Butler, and goes to College Park Church. I live on the edge of Carmel, work 5 mins from Butler, and go to College Park Church. Jesus has provided me with a new friend!!

10) A year without raaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

Rachel,

I NEED to write to you right now because I have been INSPIRED and have a brilliant idea. I was inspired by a story my friend at work just told me about an experience she had last night. You see, she is doing community relations, so she goes around town and talks to different companies and communities about the services that we offer here at the Clinic. Right? Okay well last night she went to this high-rise downtown that houses a primarily senior community, and they were having their "community meeting." So she gave her little blurb, and then sat down for the rest of the meeting, after which they started to discuss finances. Apparently they do not have enough money to pay for this year's Halloween party... a fact that ENRAGED the citizens of said senior community. They started yelling and in the throes of passionate discussion, things started getting physical. An armed guard was called in, a man was escorted out, another man ran out. A man in an electric wheelchair was steadily whir-pacing in the back for an hour and a half. Another man was banned and kept his face pressed against the glass outside. A woman suggested they take their differences and settle them at the bar. Soooo many more interesting people! Now here is my idea, Rachel. We make this into a TV SHOW. Like an Office-ish documentary that follows these residents and their community meetings. I think it's gold. Gold. I laughed so hard when she was telling this story.

That's all for now. I will post for real later.

Okay, so i had this super long, super funny, super intelligent and inciteful post but something happened when I clicked publish post and I lost it.

I'm too lazy to re-write it all.

But I do remember mentioning that the freaky-future-predicting-voodoo octopus that predicted who was going to win the soccer world cup died. HOW WILL WE KNOW WHO WINS THE SOCCER WORLD CUP! (spoiler alert, it's me)

The rest of what I wrote will be for me to know and you to NEVER know.

Toodles,
Rachel

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRF,

You will receive zero crackers because you lied. That is your just reward. Actually, your just reward would be eternal damnation, but that's not really in my power.

I am scarfing down my food. I am always SO HUNGRYYYY!!

I feel the need to go to a movie. I don't care so much about the actual movie as I do about the entire movie-going experience. Sneaking a delicious coffee drink in my bag. Pulling out a tupperware of homemade pudding to delight my tastebuds during the film. Getting weird stares from others as I sit there by myself and eat pudding out of a glass tupperware container, all the while laughing obnoxiously. Sitting in the comfy seats. Darkness. Previews. Hardcore surround sound. Other people laughing and crying and gasping. The atmosphere of people enjoying themselves. I NEED TO GO. However in order to do so, I would have to sneak in not only my coffee, but myself.

I've actually been working today. I am the only one here at this point. Well, the only VISTA. Three of the others left for lunch and aren't coming back, and the other just didn't show up. And no one really cares. Laid back is taken to extremes here.

I am going to write you a short poem:

Rachel oh Rachel

Wearer of hats

With long chestnut hair

And the eyes of a cat

Your fingers play music

But they also shoot things

I think that you practice

Mind control when you sing

So as I mentioned, I have taken to browsing international real estate at lunch. I have now expanded the breadth of my search to include national real estate as well, but only the highest quality homes as listed on the Sotheby's real estate website. I propose the following to be purchased by you for me to live in, or for us to live in together if you clean up and get your act together. We all know you have a crack(er) problem. Crumbs are not acceptable, just ask Elle.

Boulder, CO - $3 million

San Jose, Costa Rica - $5 million

Switzerland - price upon request

Chicago, IL - $7 million

Sweden - my private island

Italy - price not listed, but there are 47 bathrooms.

Let me know when you choose,

Beffa (accidental but I will go with it)

This one goes out to Riley.

I have searched far and wide for that comment you CLAIMED to have posted on one of our posts. But alas I cannot find it. Therefore I will refuse to believe you posted a comment until the proper proof is placed before me.

Sincerely,
Rachel Gotta-See-It-To-Believe-It Fuhrman

I am now going to take a short nap at work. Don't tell my boss. But if you do decide to stab me in the back and tell him I'm sleeping on the job, will you politely ask him to wait until AFTER I wake up to fire me? I needs my beauty rest.

Thanks

Sleeping Beauty (aka Rachel)

Ea,

"It took you long enough to reply to me. Next time you need to answer faster because you left me waiting here for a long time, holding my breath and wondering when I would hear from you."

That took me 1,927 mintues. I'll be anxiously awaiting my 1,927 crackers.

And it didn't take me THAT long to get back to you. A week tops. That's what happens when I actually have work to do though. So I'm gonna have to let you take that up with my boss. I'm sure he'll understand if you ask him to give me less work so I can respond to your posts. He's a cool guy.

I have snacks in my work cabinet, although I'm not famous for it. It's just cereal bars. I also have been known to have a bag of Baked Lays.

My chest feels heavy today. I think I'm coming down with DEATH!

In case you were wondering, my Modcloth wish list is officially updated as of 10 minutes ago. (in case you wanted to get me a Christmas present).

Guess what I found out today that made me very sad. Tornadoes sound like trains, that's how you know they are coming. How could the whistle of a train, a sound so wonderful, a sound that used to bring joy to my heart, now strick terror in my mind. I hope I get over this because I miss trains already.

I also have been discovering the wonders of Publisher with my job. I even got Publisher 2007 for Dummies from the library to read when I'm bored at work. Will you seriously work on a logo for our website because I think it would be cool to put on there. I'll work on one too.

And I just checked, awkwardeagle.com is available to purchase the domain name.

Alright, that's all I'm going to put since I already posted today and don't have much to say.

Elvis says hi.

Love,
Rachel

Rchl,

T tk y lng ngh t rply t m. Nxt tm y nd t nswr fstr bcs y lft m wtng hr fr lng tm, hldng my brth nd wndrng whn wld hr frm y.

Ok I'm done with that. However many minutes it takes you to interpret it, I will give you that many crackers. Go.

Anyway, those dogs were stinking cute. I love shelter dogs and will FO SHO get one when I have the money and a landlord that will allow it. Maybe next year... but probably not. One day.

I just for sure decided on a church, and sent a lot of emails so that I can get involved. I am excited to hear back and get started :)

I will personally draw an Awkward Eagle logo and create the materials for the website. I've learned that I loooooove that kind of stuff. I love using Microsoft Publisher too. Anytime you need a flier or a brochure or a postcard... I am SO on it. I should've done something career-wise in that arena. I should've done graphic design! Oh well. I refuse to go back to undergrad. I can't re-live the glory days... and yes, I am officially at the point where I can call them my glory days. Lolz Christian humor. So much to be done with "glory days."

Tornadoes are crazy. I knew storms were coming, so I checked the weather this morning when I got up to make sure that I would have enough time to drive to work. I decided I had juuuuuuuust enough, so I left my sister at home to die on the second floor and fled to my office that has a basement. Turns out she hid in the spa downstairs with our BFF Rana from India. I hid in the lobby with some immigrants. The times were good.

I need to start reading more. Curse online TV!!!!!!!!

Here and now, I proclaim: I WILL READ MORE!

I've worked on and off today, but so far it's been a good day for me as well. Besides the natural disasters and bodily pain. I mean, I don't feel like a huge lump of dreariness like I did yesterday. Yay for conversations and answered prayers!

I want food. It's 3:43. Dilemma. Except not a dilemma because I am now famous in this office for my snack drawer. This both pleases and upsets me.

Bye.

Love,

Bcc

I don't know why the below post went all weird on me and left extra spaces between paragraphs

My sister from another mister.

That sounds awkward. I think I'll just stick with Becca.

Well, yesterday was a busy day at work. I had something to do the entire day. Today, I'm bored. First of all, thanks for the talk last night. It was hard at the time, but I think it helped me because I feel a lot better now. I'm wondering how long it will take before Megan asks me if I'm blogging because I sound like a typing machine.

I brought my bible sudoku book to work today to have some fun with. Yay fun!

I already told you this but I rented some library books and how to build a website so I can create our Awkward Eagle page. Okay, so you know I'm a big thinker, many times and irrational thinker, but here's what I am envisioning for this venture...it will become so big we can make a lot of money off it by coming up with a logo, incorporating an eagle of course, and selling merchandise like t-shirts, mugs, and pens. Also, we may be big enough to come out with a book of awkward stories. A reality show may be in the works too. We gonna be rich baby, RICH!

I forgot my iPod for the gym after work. You have no idea how much this saddens me.

Welp, it's 1:50 and we are officially under the third tornado warning of my employment at UNICON. I like to make a big first impression at new jobs by causing tornadoes. Good news is Megan turned the radio on so we can hear weather updates, which means I get to listen to music while I work (aka do nothing). I imagine at times it would be quite comical to watch me in my cubicle because I dance a lot in my seat to music.

I KNEW I SHOULD'VE TYPED IN WHAT I WAS THINKING WHEN I THOUGHT OF IT BECAUSE NOW I FORGOT WHAT I WAS GOING TO SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm going to post this on your facebook wall, but I'm going to post it here too because it's that good... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2uJyCPCy5w .

So I was wondering, why do you enjoy throwing pigeons so much? They can fly so it seems like throwing them would be quite futile and pointless. How do you get any enjoyment out of this hobby?

In honor of national adopt a shelther dog month I will include in this post pictures of the dogs i want to adopt from the Franklin County Dog Shelter.

Much Regards,

Rachel

Rachel,

I legitimately believe that Awkward Eagle could be the next internet sensation. I already have enough life experiences to post about 2000 things to get the ball rolling. I think you should look into it.

I'm serious.

I also forget what else you said. Normally I am diligent and keep your post open in another tab so that I can refer back to it, but I don't feel like being diligent today. I do remember you challenging my typing skills... that is a challenge I will accept. I can blow you out of the water any day. ANY DAY. I don't think I'll accept the voicemail challenge, though. That's just not my style. And by that, I mean talking on the phone. That's why we blog.

HURRAY FOR BORDERS!!!!!!!!!!!! I am currently at Borders, and they are playing a CHRISTMAS SONG!!!!!!! The First Noel, sax style. It's so classy, and it melts my heart even more than this latte. Actually this latte isn't that great... it's pumpkin spice, but it kind of taste like someone put some Old Spice into a latte. Parody video????! But yeah, Danli and I decided to come downtown and work at Borders today instead of staying at the office. Our boss is cool and let's us work elsewhere. (Side note: he's nerdy and white as can be, but yesterday let us in on his secret past desire to be a DJ... he even danced for us a little. Highlight of my year.) Many things led to this decision. I will list them for you:

1. Discovering our mutual love of bookstores.

2. Driving by this Borders the other day and seeing a free Wi-Fi sign, AND a Seattle's Best Cafe sign.

3. Googling the bookstore and discovering that on Fridays, if you purchase a bag of Seattle's Best coffee, you get a free medium drink.

4. Opening my email today to find Borders coupons.

So as you can see, the decision was inevitable. Of course I am here, and I am enjoying it greatly. First because this is probably the coolest Borders ever. Indianapolis is actually super cool downtown, and this building is old, and has huge tall ornate ceilings and chandeliers and pillars, all marble and gold and stuff. LOVE it. Secondly, because there are currently around 500-1000 young adults meandering around me, all wearing navy jackets with a state written on the back... Indiana, Ohio, West Virginia, Florida, Kansas, etc. I caught one and asked him what they were here for. It's an FFA convention. Future Farmers of America. They are soooooo funny to watch!!! I have already seen them dodge traffic, get lost, and drink lattes with a straw. A STRAW, Rachel. Farmers, indeed.

I'm sorry. That was occupation-ist.

As you already know from my pix message this morning, I am wearing my Sheldon Bazinga T-shirt. So far, it has received rave reviews. And by rave reviews, I mean one person really liked it. It's extra funny because it's cold, so I'm wearing my black cardigan buttoned up on top of it, and so just the very top of Sheldon's head shows. At moments when I move around, one eye will peep out ever so creepily. It's golden.

So far you and dwentzel have done a poor job of taking over my wall. I am disappointed with your efforts.

I went to the gym yesterday. I am sore. That rowing machine is hardcore. Also, I am even more assured about my decision to use the elliptical instead of the treadmill. 1) We all know I can't run. 2) I creeped on the treadmill users, and I burned more calories than they did in the same amount of time.

I googled Taylor Momsen this morning to see if she has parents. She does. With all her stripping, non-clothes wearing, drinking, smoking, partying, porn, cursing, and eyeliner, I wasn't quite sure.

I am going to go use my coupon,

Becca

I forgot to post the picture of the Clown Magician for our 100th post celebration.

Enjoy

Becca,
HAPPY 100TH POST! Well, technically this is the 101st post, but since you stole that from me I'm going to pretend like it's the 100th post for me too. I'll call it the 100 1/2 post. Attached is the clown magician for the celebration. I would also suggest a singing unicorn and a cockroach pinata be used. And I'll see if I can get the Beach Boys to perform. Oooo, and can you look into getting Bruce Willis to make a guest appearance? Ever since I saw the movie Red I've wanted to meet him and see if his head is really that shiny in person.

It sounds like you had a wonderful time camping. I'm glad it was fun. I wish I could've gone but alas some things are not in God's will I guess.

I forget what else you said.

My co worker just asked if I was blogging because I sound like a typing machine. That's right, I'm a typing machine. Does that intimidate you? It should.

Speaking of co-workers, tell your co-worker who knows me that I said Hi. Does she read this blog? She should.

Carrie Zinck just called me and left me possibly the longest voicemail ever. I am extending a challenge to you now to beat her. Her voicemail was about 3 minutes long. CHALLENGE EXTENDED!

I have a paper cut in between my thumb and pointer finger. CURSE YOU AUSTIN HILMER AND YOUR PAPER-CUT-FREE HISTORY!

I was reading an article about people who were millionaires before they were 25. Almost all of them made their money from creating websites. We need to create a website. Here are some ideas I have already come up with for our website:

1) Monkey-fy yourself- Find out what you would look like if you were a monkey!
2) Selling my paper cranes on the internet as gifts and home decor.
3) A site dedicated to posting pictures of koala bears, because let's face it, what's cuter than a koala bear? NOTHING!
4) Scab central: A site where you can post APPROPRIATE pictures of oddly shaped scabs you have.
5) Jesus Food: a site where people can post pictures of food with the face of Jesus on it.
6) Awkward Eagle: Similar to MLIA, only people post awkward occurances in their life.
7) Beanie Baby Style: sells clothes made for Beanie Babies.
8) Sweet Potato Art: Sell heads of famous people we sculpted out of Sweet Potatoes. Artsy AND Nutricious.
9) Batman spottings: Seeing as how Batman really DOES exist, we could create a sight that tracks his every movements by posting pictures of him and a map showing where he is using the GPS locator I attached to him once.
10) Sheldon Cooper quotes. Nothing else need be said about this.

We're gonna be rich baby!

Rachel

1. I forget that we have a blog sometimes. And I'm too lazy to write on it.

2. This is our 100th post. I feel as if we should have some sort of celebration, like they do for TV shows. I'll get the robot, you get the clown magician. And the cupcakes.

3. Riley got "upset" with me for calling her Small-Mouth Taylor, so she decided to go and get some extreme jaw work done. I mean, I know my tongue is a sword, but I didn't think it was THAT powerful...

4. I just ate a LOT of mashed potatoes. The kind from a box. I like them so much. I know that makes me weird, but... we all know that's a given anyway. I am the queen of processed foods.

5. Sammy told me I would like Modern Family, so I started watching it a couple days ago, and now I cannot STOP! Favorite part so far:

Son: The Jonas Brothers get nervous before every concert.

Father (in a whisper): Not Kevin! He's a rock!

Son: ESPECIALLY Kevin.

6. Camping was spectacular. We had lots of photo shoots and campfires and singing, and I got to eat pumpkin ice cream, which is pretty much the dietary love of my life. I really enjoyed the following moments:

- The boys going into the woods to chop up some fallen trees to use for firewood with a very small hatchet.

- Later finding out that was illegal.

- Being cheered by our camping neighbors while we were worshiping.

- Photo shoots in the leaves.

- Andrew almost getting pooped on by a bird.

- Road trip games.

- Corbin apparently having very sensitive eyes that did not respond well to campfire smoke.

- Everyone screaming loudly as sausages rolled off the grill into the fire.

I'm sure there are more moments, but I cannot remember them at this moment.

7. I almost died today, thanks to your balloon self. Refer to Rachael's wall for further details.

8. Danli, my friend at work, now knows you and Rachael and Riley by name. She is a legitimate internet stalker, though. I kid you not, she's hardcore. But when I mention the name Rach(a)el, she's always like, "Carr? Or Fuhrman?" It amuses me.

9. The highlight of my workday was when I discovered I can get a free drink at the Borders Seattle's Best Cafe on Friday by purchasing a bag of coffee. I talked about it for MINUTES.

10. I am going back to watching Modern Family.

Oh Becca!!!! Where art thou!!!!!

So clearly you have not checked our blog lately as you have not responded it over a week, which is equivalent to 13 years on Venus. 13 YEARS BECCA!!!!!! Unacceptable. Just think of all the poor fans we have (Rachael Carr) who depend on our posts for entertainment (Rachael Carr). You are letting them (Rachael Carr) down!

Here are my thought nuggets for the day:

• I have a mysterious scar on the back of my right hand that's been there forever. I don't know what it's from. Probably from when I punched out Nicole Richie at a club in LA. NO ONE steals my crackers!
• I went to the gym last night and tried to avoid any contact with Matt, my personal trainer for a day guy, because I feel bad for not signing up for personal training, and embarrassed because he always has to show me how to use the machines properly (well, not that embarrassed). But I walked by him as I was walking out and pretended like I was playing with my iPod to avoid eye contact and he said Hi to me as I walked by and I turned around and said Hi Matt. The whole thing was very awkward. I find it hilarious now.
• How was camping? I wanted to dress like a bear and come and scare you, but I realized I still couldn't drive that far without falling asleep at the wheel, even if I was dressed like a bear.
• Did you know that Mark Zuckerburg, creator of Facebook, is 26 and worth $6.9 BILLION!!!!!!!! I'm 22 and worth about $26, if that.
• I finally have my own health insurance, which kinda excites me. So of course it figures that I would lose my first insurance card before I even got a chance to use it. But don't worry, I am having them send me another one. I FIXED IT!!!
• Purple horned-antelopes rarely skip without humming their favorite sweater in Dutch while eating paper clips.
• I just realized it's supposed to be Purple-horned antelopes.
• I had nothing to do at work yesterday, but on the bright side, I got a lot of knitting done!
• I've been wearing make up this week to help distract people from the mountainous pimples around my mouth. CURSE YOU MOTHER NATURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (but not you God, I'm cool with you)
• If I was a rare gemstone, I think I'd be an emerald because I look good in green, hence my 2010 halloween costume, a green bean.

That is all.

Goodbye,

Rachel

P.S. I SAID GOODBYE!

To: Becca of Zionsville

In an effort to start making posts shorter to accomdate our busy schedules I have created a bullet point list below of all the items I wished to mention in this post. Enjoy and be merry:

• I still need to buy another pair of black closed toed shoes to wear to work or else my toes will start getting cold soon.
• I cooked shrimp last night for dinner and it tasted EXCEPTIONAL.
• I think I'm getting better at whistling.
• I lost my iPod, but I am using my phone as a temporary mp3 player per Rachael's recommendation. She's so smart. So that should hold me over a month or two until I get come money to buy a new iPod.
• I broke Kenny, specifically his mirror.
• I'm bored at work
• I like the song "Fireflies" by Owl City
• I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, tweedly dee. And there they are standing in a row.
• I'm going to work out tonight after work. I hope I don't die because I'm still a tad sore.
• Did you know Mark Zuckerburg, co-founder of Facebook, is 26 and work $6.9 BILLION DOLLARS! I'm worth about $43.
• I bought some new headphones with a longer cord for work. I really like them. Very functional
• My cubicle needs pictures. Please send me some.
• I'm reading a book about Jane Austen's life and it mainly consists of letters her and her sister wrote to each other updating each other about their lives. I feel like we are modern Jane and Cassandra Austens and that in 75 years a similar book will be released about us.

That's it. That's all I've got. Nothing more. NOTHING.

Rachel of Reynoldsburg

I RAP LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We really are mortal enemies.

Rap off.

Done.

PAY ATTENTION BECCA, YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET SCHOOLED!!!!

I never got to meet Gorgeous, which made me very sad. I feel like we would have really hit it off. He's a lawyer, I'm a capricorn, he's good looking, I eat cereal for breakfast every morning. See what I mean?

You would be a finger-giver in your dreams. Just kidding, you wouldn't. Except that you did, but I'm sure it was a one time thing, you're too nice for that. Although I've never met dream you, so I guess dream you could be super mean, and ride a motorcycle, and wear leather with fringe, and get a tatto of a rose with thorns.

I watch Boy Meets World every morning while I eat breakfast and it's my favorite part of the day. Speaking of breakfast, I think I accidentally ate bad milk with my cereal this morning. I hope I don't die. If I do, tell Mama G I love her and that you are going to be my replacement as her daughter. I'm sure she'll be thrilled with the upgrade.

I think an alien would be more expensive because I feel like you'd have to pay a lot of money to have people research and develop the things necessary to feed and care for your alien. Trust me, I have first hand experience. Remember, I'm an alien and I have been much more expensive than their first child, who was a stegosaurus.

Kevin Joseph Timmons. He is a good kid. To bad I have a contract with Jesse Mentz to kill him. Watch your back K Joe Timm!

Last night I was hanging out with a friend from church/high school. She recorded me trying to rap like Eminem in Love The Way You Lie. She said she'd post it on Facebook because the world needs to see this. You should be excited about it, it's worth it.

I just picked up my Michael Jackson Greatest Hits CD. I realized that he's the king of pop and I know like, ZERO of his songs. I felt this was essentially a crime and must be remedied.

I think we need to work on keeping these shorter. I don't have much time to write long blog posts. Even if it meant they were more frequent it yet shorter it would be better. I haven't had much time on my hands ever since I became a superhero who's mission is to save the world from crime and low lifes like Bernie Madoff. I have a theme song, would you like to hear it? It goes like this:

"Yo, I'm a superhero and I'm gonna kick your butt! That's right."

And SCENE!

THIS IS FOR YOU, RACHEL.

Bonjour. I hope you are enjoying your meeting with Gorgeous. I don't actually think that's where you are right now. In fact, I assume that you are sitting right in front of your computer, but I wanted an opportunity to include Gorgeous in this post.

I had a dream last night that my parents and I went to this restaurant to try and get me a job. No one knew where the manager was, but eventually he came upstairs and told me NO. So as we were walking away, I gave him the finger through the window. I think it's amusing because even in my dream I was very aware that I was doing something very sinful. Then I woke up and realized dream sin doesn't count. But I confessed it anyway.

Speaking of dreams, that reminds me of the Boy Meets World episode where they test Eric while he sleeps and he becomes a medical marvel because they discover that he has less brain activity while sleeping than a rat.

I am eating rice for lunch. I realized that when I eat rice, I like to take massive bites. Like, the biggest bites I possibly can. I'm not sure why.

This song is in my head:

All the colors of the raaaaaaainbow

Hidden 'neath my skin

Hearts have colors, don't we alllllllllllllll know

Red runs through our veins

Feeeeeeel the fire burning

Upppppppp, inspire me with blood of blue and green

IIIIII haaaaaaaaaave hoooooooooooooooooooooooooope

Inside is not a heart

But a kaleeeeeeeeeidoooooooooooscope.

That was the biggest bite yet. I have impressed myself. Know who could never beat me at food shoveling? Small Mouth Taylor.

I had a fascinating discussion with Daniel Wentzel this morning. Which do you think would cost more: a baby dinosaur or an alien? We decided probably alien, depending on whether or not it's omniscient. But he worked at NASA, so I think he's biased. I also think he is Spiderman.

When I try to picture a baby dinosaur, I just see a baby elephant.

Rob asked me and Rachael if we like the smell of pumpkin. Rachael said yes. I said "PUMMMPPPPKIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!" Apparently he read that is the scent that girls like most. Agreed? Obviously I am. Maybe it makes us think of family... how nice. I read once that guys like the smell of vanilla (and lavender) most. Rob agreed. It was a short yet educational conversation. Speaking of education, I read an article today about a school in New York with, like, no rules. The kids just do what they want to do. The school offers the classes that the students want to take. For example, right now they are not offering calculus, but they are offering a class on how to make comic books.

My rice is gone. I am sad. And Becca.

Oh, Kevin Joseph Timmons creeped on me at McDonalds on Sunday. I was inside, and he was watching me through the drive thru. I laughed really hard after I was done being disturbed. I like him.

I listened to NSYNC Christmas all weekend. Joy to my world.

I wish you only the worst,

Rebecca